A couple of posts ago I was desperately trying to find the identity of the premature purchaser for my upcoming one-man spectacular,
Heroic Faun No. One. I still haven't identified them however you will be pleased to know over the last few days there has been a significant sales spike and tickets sold have shot up to seven. Here is a graph to illustrate the significance of this spike.
We've even got an E-flier. It's E for everything these days. E-commerce, E-tickets, E-by-gum. I remember when E was something you hid in your undies for you and your friend to swallow later in a public toilet, but now it seems you can drop an E before any word and someone will give you $10 million to blow before your bubble bursts. It's probably only a matter of time before someone comes up with E-theatre, where instead of going to live theatre you can just sit at home and watch actors with big parts entering and exiting on your computer screen in your undies while taking E.
Here's the E-flier anyway.
It's pretty hot. We're hoping the gratuitous use of pink will attract the elusive and fickle pink dollar as I don't think my anemic abdomen will cut the gay mustard. This is pretty much exactly what I looked like during the three month high point of my career when I skipped around the background of Narnia. As I just mentioned, it's amazing what they can do with computers these days and after a bit of CGIggery and pokery I ended up looking like this on the big screen.
Truly, truly, truly amazing. On the subject of Narnia I have just stumbled upon this image of a power metal band from Sweden called Narnia and thought I'd share it with you.
I bet these guys attract a lot of pink dollars. I wonder if they are as good as The Feelers?
Rehearsals start on Tuesday with my director who was Heroic Faun No. Three. He's the guy sitting on the bench behind me reading his newspaper. This is what he does during rehearsals as well in between telling me to, "do it better". I shall refer to him as 'The Wicked Witch of Te Kuiti'. He's no Wicked Witch of the North but I'm sure I can make him lose the plot and toss his e-fliers in anger at least once. I will keep you informed of all theatrical developments.
I am also in the process of moving to Melbourne which is another theatrical development. Like a man with chronic diarrhoea I am continually asking myself, "Where did all this shit come from?" But, my shit could be your shit if you play your cards right. Over the next few posts I will be offering some of my choicest crap up for grabs to anyone who wants to get their hands on my shit. Today's offering is two purple 2.5kg dumbbells.
Come and get them.
